Finding the Real You
Ever wonder what makes people who are successful, successful? If you asked them, they would say that they couldn’t put it down to any one thing, but they do all agree that the following 5 things certainly were major contributors:
Lifelong learning
Resilience
Optimisim
Determination
Accountability
Interestingly, as I listened to them share their thoughts, there was a common theme that ran deep through each of them, and that was that they all attested to a deep belief that their skills and knowledge continued to develop as they invested time and money in learning, working hard, and being consistent with both.
Their ability to understand their mind and their beliefs about what was possible played a huge role. Some call that a growth mindset.
My belief is that when we can push through barriers and develop an entrepreneurial mindset, it increases your ability to become antifragile. Why? Because an entrepreneurial mindset increases your exposure to taking risks, experiencing grit, and critical thinking so whilst you do not need to be an entrepreneur you can begin to think like one, this builds in “lived experience”.
This latter part is something that I facilitate as I support and develop teams and executives globally. It helps support their mindset on what the business needs whilst gaining more insight on the interdependencies that exist within different departments, perhaps across different continents, and most certainly with multiple stakeholders. This is one thing that has taken people from average performance to exceeding targets. In fact, it goes beyond their personal success stories as it also elevates their team as they reach new ceilings collectively.
Lifelong learning
This is one thing that each successful individual name as a huge contributor. They have recognised the need for ongoing learning and consistency. Each has shared that their learning has been undertaken personally as they believe in investing in themselves.
They see the investment in time and money as a tangible outcome achieved as they reflect on the lessons learnt, including the ones about themselves, their beliefs, habits, and patterns. Many have shared that whilst learning can be done through formal training programs, it has been their personal development that has equipped them to succeed.
Here are their top 5 reflections on how they were able to measure success and what brought them joy.
They recognised that their ability to reflect inwards in challenging times equipped them to make better decisions.
They realised that their previous preconceived ideas were not allowing them to be unbiased. They were closing themselves to other options.
They realised they were prepared to listen and respect differences of opinions. They were ready to sit with them without perceiving the other party as an opponent but rather someone who shared a very different perspective.
They felt more at ease, less stressed and somehow this gave them more time to think as a visionary rather than at looking at the situation in isolation.
They realised that there was so much more that they did not know. This made them what to keep learning.
Resilience
This is something all successful individuals stated and felt strongly about. They felt this helped them become who they are today. They were open to challenges and viewed obstacles as a normal part of everyday life. Whilst they each shared a common thought along the lines of “Stuff happens, you just bounce back”.
In my perspective, it’s not simply about “bouncing back” because that just places you back in the same position you started in. Those successful people, on the contrary, were in a better position. Success in people comes from their ability to be more than resilient; it is that they have developed the ability to be antifragile.
Here are their top 3 reflections on antifragility (going beyond resilience):
Each challenge is seen as another learning. They did not get stuck in the idea that something else came up to stop them.
They adapted to the situation and simply looked at what was no longer working and then began their pursuit to find what would work.
They planned for obstacles in advance. They knew that a first attempt at something was more likely to show them what doesn't work, giving them insight to respond positively rather than to react with a negative mindset.
Optimism
Success doesn't allow for pessimism, it requires a positive mind frame and to know that “You just keep going because you know what you are working towards” or “I didn’t start something not finish it, that just wasn’t an option”.
The people I talked to shared 5 similar beliefs:
They believed in what they were doing, even if it had not been done before (or at least not by them).
They did not rely on someone else to tell them that they could do it. In fact when others said it was too hard, they became more determined to find a way.
Failure was not an option, because they knew what they were doing would make a difference.
Failure is seen as only temporary and a source of learning. They see it as opportunity to try something new.
The saw everything with gratitude. They were grateful for the opportunity to try something new, to be given the opportunity to succeed, and for being able to be amongst others who thought and felt the same.
When you look at life with gratitude, no matter what is thrown at you, you discover that you have something that many people don’t have. Looking at things through the lens of what you do have, or what you have done, rather than what is missing, allows you to see that you truly do have a lot more than many others.
When you live with an abundance mindset and with optimism, you find solutions as your mind becomes open to the potential of “what else” is possible.
Determination
Of course determination is part of their framework.
Every successful person I talked to identified that they were crystal clear about what they wanted. They set goals for themselves and broke things down so that they succeeded. Being able to set yourself up for success is the key. So you break things down into bite sizes making each stage achievable whilst working towards a bigger goal.
Here are their top 3 tips:
Bite size focus points. Know your end goal and break things down to make each stage achievable. As you succeed one, you then move to the next stage, and then the next, until you are done.
I liken it to how Roger Bannister broke through the 4-minute Mile. He broke it down into 400 meters at a time and increased his speed with each section (he had pace setters run with him at each stage) so that he knew what he needed to achieve at each section.They were all diligent and did not miss a routine. They treated their goals like their life depended on them practising.
They never accepted defeat. Their determination to succeed was a focus point. Falling short made them more determined to break things down so that they knew what worked, and they focused on making changes to what didn’t. This is how they strengthen from their lessons.
Their mindset is the following: “At the end of the day it’s up to me. If I want it bad enough, I need to invest in me.”
Accountability
Not one of them alluded or referenced anyone else as being a contributor in their language or thoughts.
Ghandi says “Be the change”. Whenever you look at people who made history, in sport, politics, humanitarian work, science. They have all been the change makers. They have made personal and professional sacrifices to get to where they want to be.
They have also surrounded themselves with likeminded people because they know that success breeds success. They have been prepared to stand up and stand out and to be the voice that shows others what is possible.
Each of these successful people shared they believe it's necessary to be accountable.
Accountability gave them the power to succeed rather than giving their power away. It meant that they could always keep stretching on their own and not having to rely on anyone else for motivation.
They realised that whilst being accountable to themselves made them self reliant, they would strive more if they told someone else what they wanted to achieve. It gave them an extra drive.
Being accountable allowed them again to look at themselves and make personal adjustments. They become conscious about the differences in what they wanted and what they needed to help them achieve what they were striving for.
Accountability gave them self-satisfaction. They knew that when they did achieve each milestone, it was because they personally made the right choices and the right investments in themselves.
They recognised that becoming self-reliant for motivation was a gift and they focused on what they did have to strengthen their mind and how to apply this to other areas of their life.
Success varies for everyone and whilst we each have our own strengths, it is the mindset in which we adopt our practices, our rituals, and our habits that will equip us and take us to where we want to be.
If you are ready to move from being stuck to achieving success, you can find out how I have helped 1000’s break through barriers.
If you want to change where you are at and don’t quite know where to go, you have now been given real tangible steps.
If you are ready to invest in yourself,
If you want security,
If you want clarity,
If you want to feel joy again,
Then you are ready to invest in yourself. Think about everything you are missing out on by not joining the next program.
You know it's what you need and what you want. Yes, the investment is your genuine gift to break through what you have been feeling for years. Don't allow this to be another day, another month, another year of staying stuck.
Here is what others have said after joining my programs:
You have blown my mind
You really get me
Your questions make me stop and think
I'm just disappointed that it took me this long. I wish I had done it earlier.
Stop feeding what steals your happiness, you can do something different.
How much is your happiness worth? is $499 such a big investment when exploring what is possibly next for you?